Politics

Stark Incident! 'Skins scion sics goons on spit-taking gadfly

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Dig the footage of "Former Marine and first year law student" Mike Stark getting into a mega-wimpy tussle with some flunkies from the George Allen campaign. Stark got the brawl going with a question we should all be asking ourselves every morning: "Why did you spit on your first wife?"

Opinions? I'm watching it in a public WiFi zone with no sound, so I can't say for sure, but it looks to me like Stark is moving in pretty fast and furious, in a manner that could be interpreted as threatening to overly zealous staffers. (The arty shakycam effects may make Stark look more like a would-be assassin than he did in person.) The slap fight is good stuff though, and I give Stark full props for hanging on to his schoolboy bookbag (worn over one shoulder, koolkid-style) throughout the ordeal. As so many real-world fights do, this one reminds me of my favorite fight in literature, the lumbering brawl between Humbert Humbert and Clare Quilty:

We rolled all over the floor, in each other's arms, like two huge helpless children… I felt suffocated as he rolled over me. I rolled over him. We rolled over me. They rolled over him. We rolled over us…[E]lderly readers will surely recall at this point the obligatory scene in the Westerns of their childhood. Our tussle, however, lacked the ox-stunning fisticuffs, the flying furniture. He and I were two large dummies, stuffed with dirty cotton and rags. It was a silent, soft, formless tussle on the part of two literati… Both of us were panting as the cowman and the sheepman never do after their battle.

Remember the Stark Incident.

Merry Prankster dropout Kathy Casano, aka Stark Naked.

How would history have been different if Prince Andrew had married Koo Stark before Fergie came into the picture? How would all our lives be different if Koo Stark's cameo as "Camie" hadn't been cut from the original Star Wars: Episode Whatever the Hell It's Being Called Now?