Meanwhile, In News The Onion Missed

Jeff Taylor | December 7, 2005

Conservatives are pissed the Bush White House Christmas Cards say "Happy Holidays."

I'll let that sink in. And now, we continue:

"This clearly demonstrates that the Bush administration has suffered a loss of will and that they have capitulated to the worst elements in our culture," said William Donohue, president of the Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights.

Bush "claims to be a born-again, evangelical Christian. But he sure doesn't act like one," said Joseph Farah, editor of the conservative Web site WorldNetDaily.com. "I threw out my White House card as soon as I got it."

Yesterday Bush lit a goddamn menorah too! The National Christmas Tree might as well light up and spell "Screw Christ -- Worship Baal."