Lancelot Link, Secret Pimp

Nick Gillespie | June 6, 2005

Reader Lorin Hochstein points to this NY Times Magazine article about a Yale researcher who trained monkeys to use money by Freakonomics authors Stephen J. Dubner and Steven D. Levitt. A snippet:

Something else happened during that chaotic scene, something that convinced [economist Keith] Chen of the monkeys' true grasp of money. Perhaps the most distinguishing characteristic of money, after all, is its fungibility, the fact that it can be used to buy not just food but anything. During the chaos in the monkey cage, Chen saw something out of the corner of his eye that he would later try to play down but in his heart of hearts he knew to be true. What he witnessed was probably the first observed exchange of money for sex in the history of monkeykind. (Further proof that the monkeys truly understood money: the monkey who was paid for sex immediately traded the token in for a grape.)

Chen and collaborator psychologist Laurie Santos' research has found, in the Furry Freakonomics Brothers' gloss, "monkeys responded quite rationally to simple incentives; responded irrationally to risky gambles; failed to save; stole when they could; used money for food and, on occasion, sex. In other words, they behaved a good bit like...Homo sapiens."

Whole thing here. Mind you, these are Yale monkeys, which may explain their need to pay for sex. No word yet on whether any of the simians have been tapped for Skull & Bones.

(For those who must, Lancelot Link link here.)

Comments

Jeff|6.6.05 @ 9:56AM|#

I see a great ape battle between Yale Monkeys and Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys...

|6.6.05 @ 10:05AM|#

Someone alert Camille Paglia.

|6.6.05 @ 10:10AM|#

One monkey rolled up a twenty and snorted a line of coke.

He then went on to bankrupt several oil companies, hold minority interest in a MLB team, become governor of Texas and eventually - President of these United States.

It's amazing what a Yale monkey can do with a little money behind him.

|6.6.05 @ 10:16AM|#

"monkeys responded quite rationally to simple incentives; responded irrationally to risky gambles; failed to save; stole when they could; used money for food and, on occasion, sex. In other words, they behaved a good bit like...Homo sapiens."

If they really behaved like homo sapiens, they would have then picked leaders to keep them from doing any of these things.

|6.6.05 @ 10:17AM|#

I wonder how long it will be before they devise social security.

|6.6.05 @ 10:22AM|#

Elvis: The researcher is a step ahead of you: The introduction of money was tricky enough; it wouldn't reflect well on anyone involved if the money turned the lab into a brothel. To this end, Chen has taken steps to ensure that future monkey sex at Yale occurs as nature intended it. Thus, the first case of monkey prostitution is followed by the first monkey vice law.

|6.6.05 @ 10:29AM|#

I know some financial advisors who need to start worrying about outsourcing.

|6.6.05 @ 2:35PM|#

Money doesn't create the desire, it only makes transactions easier. All the monkeys can produce to exchange is sex and food. If they had better language, they could trade tokens for porn and socio-political commentary, too.

|6.6.05 @ 2:45PM|#

You and me baby ain't nothing but primates
Now let's do it like they do in the psychology lab now!

|6.6.05 @ 3:12PM|#

Yo, Dr. Thoreau!

I've been away for a few days, but I posted a congratulations on your "Island of Dr. T" thread.

(I also posted my hypothesis of how lightsabers work on the Star Wars thread, if you're interested.)

PS: I also have it from a reliable source that Puppy Pope Rex Rover II has conferred a special blessing upon your ascension to Ph.D. status.

|6.6.05 @ 4:10PM|#

Thanks, Stevo!

|6.6.05 @ 4:39PM|#

Stevo - I don't know much about plasma, physics, optics, etc, but I know a little, and your idea of light sabres being plasma confined by magnetic forces does seem "plausible". But again, that's coming from someone with a limited layman's understanding of how plasma "works". There are some astronomers and plasma physicists who think that we don't study plasma enough, and that it might help us better understand the universe.

Anywho, congrats, DR thoreau. And I'm always glad to hear The Puppy Pope cares about us wacky libertarians. :)

|6.6.05 @ 9:18PM|#

Y'all been ignoring my anti-eliism but here it is again.

Yale delenda est

|6.6.05 @ 9:52PM|#

Now that the monkeys have experienced the pain of laws against victimless crimes, I expect that a few libertarian monkeys will emerge to protest. We'll know they're libertarians because they'll paint their fur blue with purple grape juice.