Daily Brickbat

Absurd news bites, served fresh every day.

Charles Oliver | November 30, 1999

(Page 5 of 17)

Less Than the Law Will Allow (10/10)
At least two motorists in Johannesburg, South Africa, have been ticketed by speed cameras for traveling more than 80 kilometers per hour on the M1 North highway. The problem is that the speed limit on the road is 100 kilometers per hour—faster than they were driving. The police insist the cameras are set correctly, and the tickets were issued because of an administrative mistake. But Ronnie Frank, the motorist who discovered the problem, says it's possible that many other motorists just paid their tickets without checking to see if they were actually driving over the speed limit. "If this is happening on the M1, it could be happening on all the highways and everywhere that cameras are used," said Ana Cox, a reporter for The Star newspaper, who was also incorrectly ticketed.

Drink It Up (10/7)
Lincoln, Nebraska, police cited sportscaster Brent Musburger for having an open container of alcohol in a vehicle after a college football game. Musburger was caught drinking a beer while he was a passenger in a car.

First, the Sentence (10/6)
Women caught in the Iranian city of Shahin-Shah wearing make up, scarves that don't cover the hair and neck or sleeves that don't cover the arm down to the wrist will be arrested and immediately flogged. The prosecutor's office there has posed signs saying it has asked police to immediately bring the women they arrest to court, where prosecutors will demand the maximum sentence: 100 lashes. The notice also says that women caught with their hair not completely covered face up to 10 months in prison.

Don't Forget to Breathe (10/5)
Jason Hegg's 22-month-old son Carter has asthma, and because of his age, Carter can't use an inhaler. Instead, his family carries a portable nebulizer, a device that allows Carter to breathe a medicated mist, with them when they travel. Or at any rate, they try to. According to Hegg, federal Transportation Security Administration screeners at Duluth International Airport refused to allow him to board a plane with the nebulizer, even after he showed them information from a TSA Web site saying nebulizers are permitted on planes. Hegg says he can produce witnesses who say the TSA officials at Duluth asked each other why he had to bring the nebulizer on board, since "there's oxygen on the plane."

Smoke Gets In Your Eyes (10/4)
Police in Lawrence, Kansas, believed a local bar was serving booze after legal hours. But when an officer went to Conroy's, he didn't find anyone drinking. He found bartender Tiffany Hunter enjoying a cigarette with another employee and a couple of friends. That was a violation of the local smoking ban, so the cop cited Hunter, who now faces a maximum fine of $100. Hunter notes that when the law was passed, supporters said it would protect employees, but she isn't clear how the law protects her or the other employee who was present, who is also a smoker.

Walk This Way (10/3)
Jaywalking may not be smart, but should it be a felony? Orange County, Florida, prosecutors have asked police to arrest parents who jaywalk with their children. They are threatening to prosecute extreme cases as felony child abuse.

Animal House (9/30)
One was ordered to wear a classmate's soiled underwear. Another had his only suit stained when shaving gel was deliberately sprayed in his closet. Others had their heads dunked into dirty toilets. No, they weren't pledging a frat. They were students at the Massachusetts State Police Academy. Academy officials refuse to identify one instructor who was reassigned after allegations of hazing. But they have appointed a panel to study training procedures at the academy.

Parental Warning (9/29)
Seven rapes have been reported on the Greek island of Zakynthos so far this year, and one of the alleged rape victims and her mother now face time in jail. The victim, a 15-year-old girl, faces up to six months in jail for misleading police by initially denying she knew her alleged attacker then admitting she did. The girl says she gave conflicting statements because she was "scared and embarrassed." And her mother faces up to a year in jail for "neglecting the supervision of a minor" for allowing the girl to go dancing with friends.

Red Hot Momma (9/28)
When Joliet, Illinois, police officers raided Dorothy Campbell's home, they didn't find any of the marijuana they claimed her son Brandon was selling. But according to a lawsuit filed by the mother, who wasn't home during the raid, the police did find her sex toys and presented them to her son, asking what his mother did with the items. The lawsuit says the toys were left strewn about the house. A few days later, a sergeant came to the house and apologized for the raid, and his comments were allegedly videotaped by another of Campbell's sons, but two days after that, the police again raided the home, confiscating the video camera the son used to record that apology. They claimed there were pornographic images of a 14-year-old girl on the tape. A judge ruled police did nothing illegal in the first raid, but obtained the warrant for the second raid under false pretenses.

Garage Banned (9/27)
Homeowners in Leamington, Ontario, Canada, may not hold more than three garage sales a year. City officials say the new law will cut down on noise and traffic, but they also admit that local businesses complain yard sales hurt their revenues. Those who break the law will have their sales shut down by police, and they face fines of up to $5,000.

What Are You Smiling At? (9/26)
Britons applying for passports have been told not to smile when having their photographs taken. No, this isn't the set up for another joke about British teeth. The order is part of an effort to meet international standards on incorporating biometric technology. Smiling, it seems, can confuse facial recognition scanners, as can hair across the eyes, which has also been banned.

Suffer the Children (9/23)
Three Indonesian women have been sentenced to jail for holding a children's camp. Rebecca Loanita, Etty Pangesti and Ratna Mala Bangun held a "Happy Weekend" of songs and games for Christian children. But apparently some Muslim children also attended the event, which was enough to get the women prosecuted and convicted for trying to convert Muslim children. The women's attorneys said no child was converted and none were forced to attend. They say the women were prosecuted and convicted because of threats against the women and authorities by Muslim extremists.

To Go Baldly (9/22)
Officials in Nanjing, China, have banned bald men from driving taxis. Then again, they've also banned men with long hair or moustaches from driving them as well. And female taxi drivers can't wear a lot of makeup. The new laws are part of a drive to spruce up the city before it hosts a national sports tournament.

Losing My Religion (9/21)
A federal appeals court has upheld a decision by the U.S. Board of Immigration Appeals to deny asylum to a Chinese Christian who said he was persecuted because of his faith. Xiaodong Li says his apartment was raided and he was punched, kicked and shocked until he confessed to illegally organizing worship services in his home. The immigration board reportedly ruled that China has a right to enforce laws against unregistered churches and authorities there had punished Li for violating that law, not for his religion.

DWI, DWI, National Pastime of the Average Guy (9/20)
The Swedish government wants all new cars sold in the country to have devices to prevent drunk driving by 2012. Heavy vehicles would be required to have the devices even sooner. The devices require a driver to breathe into them and keep the car from starting if they detect alcohol on the breath.